A Tale of Bloody Vikings and the Dread Gazebo

[the_eggwhite]

It was a bitter cold night, with winds to strip the flesh from your bones. Out on this night were two bloody vikings, making their way across the land in their mighty iron train, when they found their path blocked by a hideous creature...

"What is it?" Said the first bloody viking.
"It's a Gazebo." replied another.
"What does it do?" Enquired the first, clearly confused by it's presence.
"It's blocking the tracks." came the answer.

The first bloody viking left the train and went on a scouting mission, approaching the Gazebo with care and trepidation. He looked at it. It looked at him, angrily.

"I don't like the look of it." said the investigative bloody viking.
"Why not?" enquired his still dry compatriot.
"I think", replied the rain drenched bloody viking, "that it might hit me with lightning."
"Ah."
"I", intoned the first bloody viking, knowledgeably, "suggest that caution is the way forward. We should cut of its power at the source."
"Good idea." said the second bloody viking, and bean intoning the words of power:

  "Hear me, Control,"
  "Hear me,"
  "Hear me, Control,"
  "Hear your faithful minion,"
  "Who does call on you for aid,"
  "Control please cut the power,"
  "That progress may be made."

And lo, the power was cut.

Seeing that his companion's intonations had been effective, the first of the bloody vikings once again sallied forth from the train, braving the harsh elements to do battle with the Dread Gazebo. It did struggle visciously, out there in the howling winds by the town of Brentford. It thrashed and leapt, but eventually the bloody viking was victorious, and the Gazebo was cast asunder.

Once the deed was done and the bloody viking was retured once more to his cab, his companion did once again summon the gods, to return the power of lightening to the land. Once this was done, the mighty pair did continue upon their way, arriving at last in the fabled lands of Staines.


--


Yes, my train was delayed for 30 minutes outside of Brentford because there was a gazebo on the line.

Comments

ROFLMAO!!!

[karohemd.livejournal.com]

Adrian, you just saved a terrible day at work (yes, still here).

[themadone.livejournal.com]

That Viking must have learnt from Eric's mistakes. :)

LOL!!!

[sea-cucumber.livejournal.com]

What a great story!
The Dread Gazebo strikes again! Not even the trains are safe! :)

[urizen.livejournal.com]

Typical! This was an incident just waiting to happen. Ever since the Gazebo Control Act of 1874 was repealed in 1997, there has been a threat of Gazebos running amok. When will people realize that these things are a menace?

[blue-cat.livejournal.com]

Well, like I have always said - you can't trust a Gazebo as far as you can throw it. Now what was it doing on the line? Some sinister plot I am sure!

*meeps and hids under the desk for fear of the [drum roll] DREAD GAZEBO!*

Bloody Vikings

[(Anonymous)]

Did you know that the Osborne character it a train driver these days? Just to be especially scary, he gets to drive HSTs at 125MPH!

Gazebos are curios things... They give the impression that they might keep you dry, but usually fail. They are particularly useless in the pouring rain and high winds, when they become quite animated, and start to walk away (presumably trying to find somewhere dryer).

Ed.

Re: Bloody Vikings

[eggwhite.livejournal.com]

presumably trying to find somewhere dryer

Or just looking for roleplayers or bloody vikings to threaten...

For reference (in case you haven't gathered), "Bloody Vikings" is a stock response to practically any act on the part of SWT (Seldom Working Trains), first uttered by barty.

[doris.livejournal.com]

Perhaps the Gazebo was pissed off because of Eric firing an arrow at it ;)